Decemberween in Different Universes
by Homer Starrun
Summary: It's nearly Decemberween! Read as you get to know what happens during the Decemberweens of 1936, 20X6, Cheat Commandos, and a parody of the Christmas Carol! Read and review!
1. 1936 or 1937

DECEMBERWEEN TOONS IN DIFFERENT UNIVERSES

Table of Contents:

-1936 Decemberween

-20X6 Decemberween (next week)

-Cheat Commandos Decemberween (week after that)

-A Decemberween Carol (parody of "The Christmas Carol") (maybe on the same week as Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanza, or Decemberween)

NOTE: I do not own anything that has to do with Homestar Runner. Not even anything from the Store!

1936

The usual credits pop up with the Homestar Runner. The opening credits say "A 'Merry' Show" "Presented in Grand Old Sound-O-Vision, copyright 1936". Then it shows The Homestar Runner, 1936 Marzipan, Fat Dudley, The Strong Bad, Strong Man and The Sneak with "We Wish you a Merry Christmas" being played by the instrument that makes the music in the 1936 cartoons. There is also a note that says, "No Scenes Baleeted."

Then we cut to the Homestar Runner and Fat Dudley (both wearing scarves) standing on snow. The Homestar Runner is holding his washboard and Fat Dudley's holding a harmonica.

"Hey Fat Dudley, let's play some mean music to get us a duck," said The Homestar Runner as he put a tin can on the ground in front of him.

"(Showtime noises)" replied Fat Dudley as he threw the harmonica to his "mouth."

"And a one, two, and nine!" said the Homestar Runner as they began playing, horribly.

After Fat Dudley blew his harmonica out of his mouth, The Strong Bad, Strong Man, and The Sneak (all wearing earmuffs) came.

"So, you're making piffling music for the not-so-deaf so you can get a turkey?" asked The Strong Bad.

"Duck," replied The Homestar Runner as he continued playing his washboard.

"Fine, here is some coin to get you that duck!" said The Strong Bad as he tossed a tiny piece of metal in the tin can.

"Thanks person," thanked The Homestar Runner as The Strong Bad, The Sneak, and Strong Man walked away.

Then The Homestar Runner and Fat Dudley walked to the Guy at the Depot (with an earmuff and scarf) at the Depot.

"One duck please," said The Homestar Runner as he gave the Guy at the Depot his tin can.

The Guy at the Depot emptied the can to reveal a bolt.

"No coin, no duck," replied the Guy at the Depot.

"Let's go," The Homestar Runner said to Fat Dudley, who looked disappointed that there was going to be no duck.

So The Homestar Runner and Fat Dudley went to the fence. On the way, they passed by Sickly Sam sitting down with a tin can in front of him.

"Can you give me some coins or at least some bolts?" asked Sickly Sam.

"I would, but I have to put this in my present," said The Homestar Runner.

"Oh jeez, you know what that means," said Sickly Sam as he imploded into his potato sack.

"No sir, no I didn't," replied The Homestar Runner.

Then the potato sack disappeared in smoke with a wheezing sound.

"Actually, I have," added The Homestar Runner.

At the fenced area, 1936 Marzipan, who next to a small tree and was wearing a scarf, was waiting for them, looking scared.

"Oh The Homestar Runner! Our presents are gone!" cried out 1936 Marzipan.

"What?" asked The Homestar Runner.

"Our presents are gone!"

"What?"

"(Showtime noises)" said Fat Dudley.

"Oh no! Who could've done this?" asked The Homestar Runner in panic.

Then we see The Strong Bad's telescope and The Strong Bad.

"Hahaha! We have their presents, and now we'll dash off to our secret hideout!" said The Strong Bad.

"RRRRRRRRRR!" growled Strong Man as The Sneak wagged its nose.

Meanwhile, The Homestar Runner, Fat Dudley, and 1936 Marzipan were looking for their presents. They passed by the Barbershop Trio, who were singing "Carol of the Bells."

"Hark hear the bells, bright silver bells…" sang the Barbershop Trio in their style.

Then the Homestar Runner stopped.

"What are you doing?" asked 1936 Marzipan.

"I'm going to play some mean music for some mean presents," explained The Homestar Runner as he got out his washboard and began playing it…

…and then a cart drove by and crushed the washboard.

"Aw," groaned The Homestar Runner.

Then Fat Dudley and 1936 Marzipan saw The Strong Bad, Strong Man, and The Sneak with a large sack on the cart.

"Happy Decemberween!" shouted The Strong Bad.

"He has our presents!" exclaimed 1936 Marzipan.

"I could use a new washboard. I could get one for Decemberween," said The Homestar Runner, not focusing on what was important.

"Let's follow that cart!" said 1936 Marzipan.

"Okay."

So the three followed the tracks made by that cart. They arrived at a wooden shack (with two catapults on both sides of it which are for sightseeing) right by a cliff. They entered to find The Strong Bad, Strong Man, and The Sneak with a sack full of their presents. Strong Man was standing in front of the sack.

"Hahaha! You think that you will get your presents back? Nay! Strong Man is guarding your silly presents. You will never get them back now!" said The Strong Bad.

"Aw shucks," said The Homestar as he kicked a nearby can.

And that started a chain reaction. It struck a pipe, squirting water through a hole in the shack and into a bird outside, making it fall on one end of a catapult, flinging a small rock through the window and at The Strong Bad, making him fall on a loose floorboard that The Sneak was on, sending him flying into Strong Man's face. Strong Man lost balance and fell on another floorboard that sent the sack of presents flying out of the window and into another catapult with gunpowder. The gunpowder was flung in the fire while the good guys ran out, and…

**BOOM!**

The shack blew up as The Strong Bad, The Sneak, and Strong Man (on fire) ran away, screaming at the top of their lungs.

"Well, you know what that means. And now I'll do a dance," said The Homestar as he began dancing with "We Wish you a Merry Christmas" playing for the dance music.

Then we cut to a table with the good guys and the Guy from the Depot at a table, eating a "duck" (it's a plate that has a piece of paper on it that says "Duck") while Homestar played music with his new washboard. Cover your ears. It's worse than the last one.

"Happy Decemberween!" said 1936 Marzipan, Guy at the Depot, Fat Dudley (translated from showtime noises) while The Homestar Runner continued playing.

Meanwhile, The Strong Bad's head poked out of the snow. His head was still on fire a little bit.

"Where am I?"

Suddenly, a polar bear's head popped out of the snow.

"What are you doing here, you mangy vermin? Get lost!" shouted The Strong Bad.

Then the polar bear growled as it revealed its claws.

"Oh dash it all!" said The Strong Bad.

**THE END of this CHAPTER**


	2. 20x6

NOTE: I do not own anything that has to do with Homestar Runner. Not even anything from the Store!

20X6

Characters in 20X6:

Strong Bad – Stinkoman

Poopsmith – Stickly-Man

King of Town – Santa Man

Homestar – Homekid (20X6 Homestar)

Coach Z – Zee-Gee-Oh (20X6 Coach Z)

In a snow less city on Decemberween Eve, Stinkoman and Stickly-Man met on the grass.

"IS it NECESSARY to have a CHALLENGE on Decemberween Eve?" asked Stinkoman.

Stickly-Man nodded.

"Okay! Double Deuce!" shouted Stinkoman as they both jumped.

Stickly-Man was about to do his signature shovel stab when Stinkoman did his signature Double Deuce through Stickly-Man, making him die like Megaman would in the game. However, Stinkoman was still flying. And for that, he sliced through a plane.

"Oh no!" exclaimed Santa Man, who was flying the plane.

Then the plane crashed onto the ground as Stinkoman landed.

"Yeah! I totally 20X6'd you good!" shouted Stinkoman as Homekid came.

"Hey Stinkoman! You sliced up Santa Man's plane!" exclaimed Homekid.

"Oh no!" shouted Stinkoman as he observed the destruction he had just made.

Then he found a sack and began looking in it.

"What are you looking for?" asked Homekid.

"My present, duh," replied Stinkoman as he continued looking, until he froze.

"What?"

"All right!" shouted Stinkoman as he held up his present, a Stinkoman chibli-doll, or a small, cute-looking Stinkoman doll, "My very own Stinkoman chibli-doll!"

"I got a Stinkoman chibli-doll too! It's original!" shouted Homekid as he held up his doll he found in the sack.

"Give me that! All originals are mine, since I'm Stinkoman!" said Stinkoman as he took Homekid's doll.

"Yeah! You're right!" replied Homekid.

Suddenly, a white hand took a doll and gave it to Homekid. Then it took the other doll. Then we see that the white hand was a hologram made by Zee-Gee-Oh, the wise.

"Whoa! Zee-Gee-Oh! WHAT are you doing with my CHIBLI-DOLL?" asked Stinkoman.

"Stinkoman, you have ruined Decemberween for this city. You have injured Santa Man, so no one will get their presents. You must deliver the rest of the present to the civilians, or you will never get your chibli-doll back," ordered Zee-Gee-Oh.

"WHAT? That's not right!" shouted Stinkoman.

"Well, it is," replied Zee-Gee-Oh as he teleported.

"WAIT! I'm not going to do a sissy job of being the present, giver, guy, man, Stinkoman," argued Stinkoman as Zee-Gee-Oh's hologram came back.

"WHAT?? That isn't good enough for you? Then, I'll, uh, fine, I'll make you fight Santa Man. If you win, you get your chibli-doll back. If you lose, uh, that's undecided," explained Zee-Gee-Oh.

"OKAY!" shouted Stinkoman as Zee-Gee-Oh revived Santa Man.

"You'll pay, uh, guy, man, Stinkoman!" shouted Santa Man.

"Not unless I win. Now I will do my STINKO KICK!" shouted Stinkoman as he kicked a few times, shooting fireballs at Santa Man.

A few scorched Santa Man.

"Now for my REAL STINKO KICK!" shouted Stinkoman as he jumped to Santa Man to kick him really hard with his metal boots.

Suddenly, Santa Man shot a barrage of snowballs at Stinkoman, sending him to the ground in a pile of snow.

"MAN! This stinks," remarked Stinkoman before bursting out of the snow with a Double Deuce.

"Prepare for my more deadlier weapons!" said Santa Man as he tossed presents at Stinkoman, blowing up on him.

"That's lame, man, lame! LAME AS YOU!" shouted Stinkoman before Santa Man pelted Stinkoman with snowballs and present bombs again.

"You will never win against me! You will pay! Especially since I haven't been able to eat my two-hundred billion cookies and milk!" shouted Santa Man.

"So what? Prepare for my DOUBLE DEUCE!" shouted Stinkoman as he jumped into the air.

Then Santa Man shot a wreath at Stinkoman. It wrapped around his neck. For a second, we see only Stinkoman's head surrounded by the wreath. Red letters say "Happy Decemberween (Happy Decemberween in Japanese)" before Stinkoman (with his whole body) fell to the ground while the wreath pinned him.

Then red futuristic words that said "_GAME OVER_" appeared on the screen.

"Oh crap! I lost again!" shouted Strong Bad as he finished playing the computer game on The Cheat's Tangerine Dreams computer.

Then The Cheat and Homestar walked to Strong Bad at the computer.

"Seriously, The Cheat. This is the worst Decemberween present you've ever given me last year. I mean, Stinkoman Vs. Decemberween? Jeez, I'd have more fun with mud and a stick, and a rock," complained Strong Bad.

"And it's fun! Ooh, a video game! Let me play! Let me play!" shouted Homestar as he played the computer game.

Stinkoman was at the beginning of the level. Then he ran until he came to a bottomless pit. Instead of jumping over it, Stinkoman ran into it and fell into the bottomless pit to his doom. Then the Game Over message appeared again.

"I win! You know, since the game is ovew," said Homestar as The Cheat pushed him away and played the game.

After two minutes, The Cheat got to the fight between Stinkoman and Santa Man. The Cheat made Stinkoman to a lot of cool combos in order to do a Super Deuce, so he defeated Santa Man in a minute, showing the words "_CONGRETULATION!"_ in green.

"Whoa! You're good. For that, you get… something good and fancy as soon as I think of it. Come on The Cheat," said Strong Bad as he left the room with The Cheat following.

"So, weadews, what the cwap am I doing hewe?" asked Homestar as he sat on the stool.

_THE END_

NOTE: The spelling is intentional. It was from a Strong Bad email DVD bonus email: videro games.

STAY TUNED FOR NEXT WEEK'S DECEMBERWEEN STORY, CHEAT COMMANDOS, DECEMBERWEEN, OR DESTRUCTIONWEEN?


	3. Cheat Commandos Decemberween

NOTE: I don't own anything that has to do with Homestar Runner, besides the stories I made. And you might have thought the last one sucked (I'm not comfortable with anime, so I too knew it sucked), but this one, as well as the grand finale, will be better. Anyway, I did this later than I thought for I had to study last week for tests. Anyway, here's Cheat Commandos!

**Cheat Commandos: Decemberween or Destructionween?**

We go to the Cheat Commandos Headquarters Playset in a snowy area on Decemberween Eve. Inside, all of the Cheat Commandos except for Foxface (doing last minute Decemberween shopping at the mall) and Flashfight (he's working late at "Ze Pentagon") were gathered in the living room where there was a picture of Gunhaver.

"All right guys, now that we have our lists ready, let's say what we asked Santa to give us!" announced Gunhaver.

"Isn't that supposed to be private?" asked Reynolds.

"NO! Not for the Cheat Commandos, but since you're not really one, we're going to force you to say what you want! Okay, I'll start. I wanted a Kahr P9 gun!" said Gunhaver.

"You always wanted guns," muttered Reynolds.

"I wanted earmuffs!" said Silent Rip.

"I wanted a double-edged commando knife!" said Fightgar.

"I wanted shaving cream to eat, I mean shave!" said Reinforcements.

"(Cheat noises)" said Firebert.

"No way! You should have asked for a better commando name!" retorted Gunhaver as Firebert sighed.

"_I wanted a large set of shurikens,_" said Ripberger in Japanese.

"Since no one understood what you said, we'll say you didn't want anything, so you won't get anything!" said Gunhaver.

"_Oh man! I never got what I want! Getting a set of shurikens is not hard!_" complained Ripberger in Japanese.

Crackotage opened his mouth when Gunhaver dived at him and shut his mouth.

"We have no time for couplets!" said Gunhaver as he walked away.

"All I wanted were some Baha Men CDs," said Crackotage with no couplets, breaking his tradition of talking, but no one heard that.

"I want to go on missions!" said Reynolds.

"That's extremely ridiculous! Come on, let's go do some stuff…" began Gunhaver as the Blue Las-Alert went off.

"It's a Blue Las-Alert!" said Silent Rip.

"We know that! Bring it up on screen!" ordered Gunhaver.

Silent Rip pressed enter on the computer to reveal Blue Laser and his minions (4!) at a toy store.

"Blue Laser's been spotted at the toy store at the mall on Decemberween Eve 90 Discount Sale!" said Silent Rip.

"With the money he could save from…" began Gunhaver.

"Uh Gunhaver, this is what you say all the time, and we usually break his chances for a normal life, and he probably wants to crush you for revenge after that event some years ago before the show even started," interrupted Reynolds.

"What's your point?" asked Gunhaver.

"He might become a good guy, and we're ruining him!" said Reynolds.

Gunhaver and Silent Rip just stared at him menacingly.

"All right, he is trying to save money so he can buy toys for his babies so he can make super weapons he can use with the happy twins. You have to go save him while I stay here and get your presents from the storage room, I mean do something unimportant," said Reynolds in a monotone voice.

"But you're not staying here! You're coming with us on the mission!" said Gunhaver.

"Really?" asked Reynolds with excitement.

"Of course! You're going to be the guy who walks with us so we won't be suspected as the Cheat Commandos. Other than that, you're still worthless!" explained Gunhaver.

"Oh, I'm still worthless," groaned Reynolds.

"But Firebert's staying here because his commando name stinks!" shouted Gunhaver, being answered with a Cheatish sigh, "Anyway, let's rock, rock, on!"

As the commandos went to the vehicle room, Reynolds whispered something in Firebert's ear. Inside, they were about to board the jet, but it was an empty space with a note that said:

"_Out for shopping. Took all of your vehicles to car/airplane washes. Why can't you clean your vehicles? Love, Foxface."_

"Oh man! We have to go to the mall another way!" said Gunhaver.

"Walking, perhaps? It's good for us," suggested Reynolds.

"That sucks as Firebert's commando name! We'll take the bus!" announced Gunhaver.

So the commandos boarded a bus headed for the mall.

"So, how much does it cost to go in?" asked Gunhaver.

"Considering you have destroyed my bus a lot of times, it's $100 for each of you," replied the Cheat bus driver.

"But we're not Cheat Commandos, we're Reynolds Commandos! Reynolds, pay for us!" ordered Gunhaver as he pushed Reynolds in front.

"It's a quarter for each," said the bus driver as Reynolds paid $1.75 for the Cheat Commandos, or "Reynolds Commandos."

Soon, they arrived at the mall, with Reynolds in front of them to convince people they were not the Cheat Commandos. Then they arrived at the toy store, where Blue Laser was putting toy guns in the cart with help from the four minions.

"Aren't these inappropriate for the children, sir?" asked a Blue Laser minion.

"OF COURSE NOT! THE TOY GUNS WILL BE PERFECT TO PREPARE THE TWINS TO BECOME THE NEXT LEADERS OF BLUE LASER WHEN I CAN'T BE LEADER FOR SOME REASON!" screeched Blue Laser.

"But sir, you started training when you were 21 years old, sir," said another Blue Laser minion.

"OH SHUT UP!" screeched Blue Laser.

Meanwhile, Reynolds was standing in front of a Cheat statue on a fountain while the rest of the commandos were behind it. Gunhaver was looking through binoculars.

"It looks like Reynolds back doesn't look…" began Gunhaver.

"Uh, Gunhaver, I can hear what you're saying about my back," interrupted Reynolds.

"Okay, anyway, it looks like Blue Laser's buying toy guns for his twins so he can create a greater force made of three leaders! We got to go!" shouted Gunhaver as he sprang from his position and crashed through the wall next to the entrance. The other commandos except for Reynolds and Silent Rip did so. Silent Rip jumped through the entrance and crashed into the cashier, who said, "Watch where you're jumping!"

"Not so fast Blue Laser!" shouted Gunhaver as he appeared to the scene.

"UGH! WHY? WHY CAN'T YOU JUST STAY HOME ON DECEMBERWEEN EVE?" asked Blue Laser.

"Because you drink Listerine on Decemberween! He, he, hah, hah!" said Crackotage.

"WHAT? I DON'T DRINK LISTERINE! BUT THAT BOZO OVER THERE IS MORE LIKELY TO!" screeched Blue Laser as he pointed to Reinforcements.

"Hey! Quit insorlting me! Now I have to drink my morthwash!" said Reinforcements before turning around and drinking Scope Mouthwash.

"Uh, back to the subject. Because we know you're up to something evil!" replied Fightgar as he held his gun and fired, doing nothing.

"Why didn't you load it with bullets?" asked Gunhaver.

"Uh, I don't know," replied Fightgar.

Then Fightgar found a piece of paper taped onto his gun. He read it:

_Dear Fightgar,_

_Along with the Cheat Commando vehicles, I've also taken your bullets to the bullet wash. You know, it's always nice to wash your bullets, because you want to be clean!_

_Foxface_

"SO, YOU THINK I'M DOING SOMETHING EVIL EVERYTIME I GO OUT OF MY HOUSE, WHICH IS LIKE, TWO TIMES A WEEK? I TRY TO HAVE A NORMAL LIFE, BESIDES TRYING TO CRUSH YOU…" screeched Blue Laser after Fightgar read the letter.

"See?" asked Reynolds.

"Just continue being stupid, civilian," shouted Gunhaver.

"And do not die, for I won't say good-bye, he, he, hah, hah!" said Crackotage with his couplet.

"…BEFORE THAT CIVILIAN LOSER INTERRUPTED, I TRY TO HAVE A NORMAL LIFE, BESIDES TRYING TO CRUSH YOU, AFTER GOING TO JAIL FROM TRYING TO BLOW UP THE WORLD, AND YOU PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING? FINE! THAT'S IT! I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE! YOU!" screeched Blue Laser as he pointed to the third Blue Laser minion, "ACTIVATE THE _BLUE LASER_!"

"The Blue Laser? Sir?" asked the minions in shock as the Cheat Commandos gasped and ominous music played.

"YES, THE SAME LASER WE USED TO DESTROY THE TENTH PLANET OF THE SOLAR SYSTEM!" shouted Blue Laser as even more ominous music played.

"_There is no tenth planet of the solar system,_" said Ripberger in Japanese, oblivious to the fact that nobody understood him.

"GET THE BLUE LASER READY!"

Then the fourth minion got out a remote control and began pressing buttons for like, twenty minutes, with everybody standing in one spot.

"WHAT THE CRAP IS TAKING YOU SO LONG?" asked Blue Laser.

"I'm entering the code for maximum power," said the minion, who was new.

"YOU FORGOT 'SIR!'" shouted Blue Laser.

"Sir," added the minion.

"CODE, SCHMODE! JUST FIRE THE BLUE LASER AT THE MALL AT…" began Blue Laser as he pointed to Reynolds, "THAT GUY!"

"What? Me?" asked Reynolds as a minion shot some sort of binding, trapping him.

"Oh no! Reynolds is going to be zapped. There's nothing we can do! What shall we do? We're going to be doomed! Anakin Skywalker is going to be Darth Vader next year! Am I hyperventilating? Should we care? Am I talking too much?" asked Gunhaver.

Outside of Earth in outer space, a blue satellite with the Blue Laser logo flew above where the mall is. Then the satellite made the glass roof of the mall open up. Then it fired a large blue laser to be aimed at Reynolds. The laser was inches away from zapping Reynolds into oblivion when…

Foxface dove to the scene, dropping all of her large shopping bags, and blocked the laser with her bulletproof khaki-style handbag. The handbag had a lot of armor to force the blue laser back at the satellite, destroying it in a big fiery ball seen from Earth and Mars.

"Ooh," said everyone, awed by the sight, before doing what they were doing a minute ago.

"DRAT! WE WERE FOILED BY A LOCAL LADY!" shouted Blue Laser.

"No, she's one of us!" said Gunhaver.

"WHAT?! SHE'S ONE OF THE GUYS?!" asked Blue Laser.

"I'm not one of the 'guys;' I'm better," replied Foxface as she walked up to Blue Laser and whacked him with her handbag, sending him flying into a shelf, making boxes on the shelf fall and crush two of the Blue Laser minions.

"Wow, Foxface _does_ love me!" exclaimed Reynolds.

Then Foxface walked up to Reynolds and whacked his face with her handbag, sending him toppling on the floor, unable to move, for he was still trapped.

"Come on, let's go back to the headquarters playset!" said Gunhaver as they exited the mall (leaving Reynolds behind from the excitement) and boarded the newly washed Action Figure Storage Truck.

Back at the headquarters playset, they saw Firebert dressed up as Santa, carrying a sack of presents.

"Firebert, that costume sucks! Are you telling me you were that Santa who gave us presents all along? You've deceived us! You're grounded! Go home!" ordered Gunhaver as the depressed Firebert walked away.

On Decemberween morning, everyone opened their presents, and they all got what they didn't want, Deep Impact DVDs for each of them (they got that for the last five years). Reynolds was still in the mall (closed), Firebert was at home and was not enjoying Decemberween, and Flashfight came and they all had Decemberween breakfast.

"Happy Decemberween. Rock, rock, on!" said all of the Cheat Commandos (except for Ripberger, who spoke in Japanese, except for the last sentence).

"Cheat Commandos, happy Decemberween, buy all our playsets and toys!" sang the voices who would sing the Cheat Commandos song.

**Epilogue:**

Blue Laser and his remaining minions were singing the Decemberween song, very badly.

"DECEMBERWEEN, DECEMBERWEEN, YOU'RE 55 DAYS AFTER HALLOWEEN!"

"WITH CHEAT COMMANDOS RUNNING FOR THEIR LIVES! I WISH THEY ALL WERE TINY-SIZED!" screeched/sang Blue Laser.

"DECEMBERWEEN, DECEMBERWEEN, I JUST HATE DRINKING LISTERINE!!" sang Blue Laser as all glass in the area broke.

**THE END**

Stay tuned for the Decemberween Carol! (Parodying Charles Dickens' Christmas Carol)


	4. The Decemberween Carol Part I

NOTE: Due to the whole Decemberween Carol story being like 9 pages long, for your convenience, I'll divide this story into two so you'll only read the beginning and Strong Bad's look in the past. Here is part one:

**A Decemberween Carol - Part I**

Seven years ago…

Strong Bad lost his best friend. His name was Dead Bad. He was now dead, dead as a doornail. His funeral was celebrated with great sadness, for a lot cared and liked Dead Bad, although he moved into Free Country half a year ago.

Back to the present…

Free Country, USA was snowing at the night of Decemberween Eve as Strong Bad and The Cheat were running away. The Cheat was running slower because he injured his leg.

"And stay out!" shouted the King of Town from his castle.

"The Cheat, why did you have to screw up our caper?" asked Strong Bad.

"(Cheatish noises)" replied The Cheat.

"Well, that was pretty obvious to see! Of course, you're so short and inferior, you couldn't see!"

"(Cheatish noises)"

"Well, I hope your 'leg' is hurt really bad! You deserve it! Don't come to my house, inferior!" shouted Strong Bad as he walked away, leaving The Cheat behind.

Then the opening credits appeared and opening music played as Strong Bad walked across the snowy field, passing by some people.

"Hey Strong Bad, mind if I can stay at your house? The gym's snowed in and I can't get in and…" began Coach Z.

"Whatever, inferior," said Strong Bad as he continued walking, leaving Coach Z in dismay.

Then he walked by Bubs' Concession Stand.

"Hey Strong Bad, I need some more money, wanna buy some crap?" asked Bubs.

"No, inferior," replied Strong Bad as he continued walking.

Then he walked by Senor Cardgage.

"Whoa! We meet again!" exclaimed Strong Bad.

"AAAAAAAAA! I'm the master of disguise!" shouted Homsar in his Senor Cardgage costume as "Senor Cardgage" donned a bowler hat.

"Ugh, it's weirdo, weirdly inferior," muttered Strong Bad as he left.

Soon, he arrived at Strongbadia. He noticed some spaces were clean of snow.

"Who did this?" wondered Strong Bad.

"Suwpwise, suwpwise!" said Homestar as he appeared with a scarf and hat.

"What the crap are you doing here?"

"I'm taking cawe of Stwongbadia. Take a look," said Homestar.

Strong Bad saw that Homestar tried to dig up the snow. Then he threw the snow at the Tire, Stop sign, and the Cinder block, making Strongbadia even worse.

"Oh yeah, whatever. Get lost!" shouted Strong Bad as Homestar ran away.

Then he entered his house, where he tripped Strong Sad and kicked Strong Mad's shin for the fun of it. He also deleted all emails on his Lappy 486 for fun, mostly because they kept on saying "Happy Decemberween, be nice to people! Signed, Anonymous" and stuff like that. Soon, he fell asleep on his couch.

"Lylat Wars, Star Flight, King's Quest, Mario Paint, some other old game," muttered Strong Bad in his sleep, until it felt cold.

"Brr. Jeez, I might have to think about wearing a shirt on Decemberween. Nah," said Strong Bad as he opened his eyes.

"What the crap?" asked Strong Bad, "Who are you?"

"What do you think? I am Dead Bad!" said the ghost of Dead Bad, who was shaped like Strong Bad, but he was all bones and had a scratchy voice and had bones of a ponytail (not that he didn't look like this when he was alive). He was transparent, unlike his alive self. He was also carrying a chain attached to his right hand for some reason.

"Wait a sec; are you the ghost at the beginning of the Christmas Carol movie? Man, you suck more than the actual ghost does," said Strong Bad.

"Well, you are going to be visited with three spirits of Decemberween! The first one will come on one-o-clock. And for conveniences and parodying purposes, the next spirit will come on two-o-clock, and the next one on the next hour, and you'll wake up some other time," explained Dead Bad. Then he disappeared.

"Well, that was at least weirder than Homsar on a daily basis. Back to sleeping," said Strong Bad as he tried to sleep, but couldn't mutter video game/computer game names.

On one-o-clock, a strange draft woke him up.

"What the crap? What the crap is that?" asked Strong Bad.

He was looking at Sickly Sam of 1936.

"Dead dude, aren't you supposed to be a dead dude, er, um, 68 years ago?" asked Strong Bad.

"Not tonight. I'm the spirit of Decemberween past," said Sickly Sam.

"Really, I thought Homsar was," muttered Strong Bad.

Suddenly, Sickly Sam grabbed Strong Bad and flew with him through time.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" screamed Strong Bad as he was being transported, painfully.

Then he landed in Free Country USA, but it was snowing a little. The trees in the background were smaller.

"Uh, where are we?" asked Strong Bad.

"We are in your past," replied Sickly Sam.

Suddenly, Strong Bad saw Little Strong Bad.

"Whoa! You are right. Hey, does this mean no one but you will notice me?" asked Strong Bad.

"That's right."

Then they saw a kid version of Homestar, a small guy with overalls, yellow shirt with a duck on it, and a hat too large for his head.

"Hey! You revealed that that kid's book was false! Now I have to make another flashback! Thanks a lot dead dude!" shouted Strong Bad.

"Hey Stwong Bad," began Little Homestar.

"It's Strong Bad. Strong. Not Stwong. But hopefully, your R's will get better," said Little Strong Bad.

"_I_ said that? Geez, I need to gargle when I get back... in time," muttered Strong Bad.

"Anyway, hey Stwong Bad, wanna thwow snowballs at each othew?" asked Little Homestar.

"Okay!" replied Little Strong Bad.

Then they played a friendly game of tossing snowballs at each other. Suddenly, rock guitar music began playing as Little Strong Mad (er, well, smaller than his present version, wearing a light blue singlet) came.

"BEAT YOU UP! BEAT YOU UP!" shouted Little Strong Mad, whose voice hasn't changed at all.

"Oh no! We'we going to be beaten up!" exclaimed Little Homestar.

"Leave it to me. Hey big bro, I'll give you $5 if you don't beat us up," said Little Strong Bad as he gave Little Strong Mad his money.

"YAY!" shouted Little Strong Mad as he walked away.

"Thanks Stwong Bad! What was that $5 fow?" asked Little Homestar.

"The present for baby Strong Sad. Now what can I buy him? I have no money!" cried out Little Strong Bad.

"I can help! Hewe, have $5," said Little Homestar as he gave Little Strong Bad a $5 bill.

"Aw, thanks," thanked Little Strong Bad.

"Okay, what's the point of this crap?" asked Strong Bad.

"You were the nicest guy of Free Country," replied Sickly Sam.

Then they saw other times with Little Strong Bad helping Coach Z (with an afro) clean out the snow blocking the way to his gym. Then they saw Little Strong Bad buying a snow globe that said: "You're #1!" from Bubs Concession Stand for Baby Strong Sad, as well as taking care of him.

"Ugh, I'm feeling sick already! Can we move on?" asked Strong Bad.

"Oh all right," said Sickly Sam as they were about to see Little Marzipan.

Then they went through time again. But Strong Bad didn't come home. In fact, they arrived at a library in front of a table with a storybook: Strong Bad's Worst Decemberween by Leomard Sportsinterviews. It was in the summer, this year.

"Everyone loves the Strong Bad. He is a very nice guy," read the caption while there was a picture of Strong Bad in front of a star in the book.

"Ugh, where the crap are we?" asked Strong Bad.

"Shh," said everyone in the library as the librarian pointed to a **"Be Quiet, or Else"** sign.

"Just read the book," whispered Sickly Sam.

Strong Bad read the first page and turned to the next one.

"On Decemberween Eve, Strong Bad got a letter."

Next page:

"The letter was from a very, _very_ hot girl whose name was Beth."

Next page:

"'Oh wow! She's sure a hot looking girl! I think I'll invite her over for Decemberween,' said Strong Bad."

Next page:

"Then along came the Homestar Runner and his best friend, Pom Pom."

Next page:

"'Hey Strong Bad! What'ya have?'said the Homestar Runner.

'I have a letter from a hot girl,' said Strong Bad."

Next page:

"'I wanna hot girl!' said the Homestar Runner.

'Too bad, there's only one hot girl, and she's mine!' said Strong Bad."

Next page:

"'Come on, you're a nice guy, so you can give me the letter from the hot girl!' said the Homestar Runner."

Next page:

"Strong Bad could not hold up his kindness any longer."

Next page:

"So Strong Bad losthis temper and mindand punched the Homestar Runner in the face."

Next page:

"And then he threw a pin at Pom Pom, who deflated and wasn't seen for a month or two or three or four or a year."

Next page:

"The next day, which was Decemberween, Strong Bad went to the Decemberween tree."

Next page:

"There was a present for Strong Sad and a present for Strong Mad."

Next page:

"But Strong Bad only got a lump of coal."

Next page:

"'What? I'm nice and I get a lump of coal? That's it, I'm going to be mean and greedy and aggressive and all other bad stuff!' said Strong Bad."

Next page:

"So Strong Bad became mean and was mean to all people instead of being nice to people on Decemberween."

Next page:

"Knowing that being mean was easier than being nice, Strong Bad became as mean as ever. THE END."

"Well, that story sucked. Hey Sickly Sam, SICKLY SAM!" called Strong Bad.

Strong Bad was kicked out of the library. Then Sickly Sam, out of nowhere, grabbed Strong Bad and flew him back to his house on his couch.

TO BE CONTINUED...


	5. The Decemberween Carol Part II

**The Decemberween Carol Part 2**

Strong Bad didn't wait a lot, for going to his past took some time. So after a few minutes, it was two o'clock. He expected another ghost, like Sir Strong Bad, to show up.Instead,he saw Marshie.

"Buy my Decemberween Red and Green Marshmallow-flavored Marshmallows!" said Marshie.

"AAAAAA!" screamed Strong Bad as he fainted for an hour.

"Good job Marshie. Now I'll take over from here!" said the King of Town as he reached up and ate Marshie and looked over Strong Bad until two-o-clock.

Then Strong Bad woke up.

"What are you doing in my house?" asked Strong Bad.

"I am the spirit of Decemberween present!" explained the King of Town.

"Aren't you supposed to be eating right now instead of showing me what everyone else is doing?" asked Strong Bad.

"I can manage for tonight," said the King of Town as he "grabbed" Strong Bad and went through a vortex through time.

"Uh, King of Dorks? If you are the spirit of the present, then aren't we supposed to just go outside and spy on everyone else?" asked Strong Bad.

"Ooh, right!" remembered The King of Town as they stopped flying, and landed in Strong Bad's party room, where Strong Mad, Strong Sad, Coach Z, and Bubs were having a very late-night party while drinking Not so Cold Ones while having a buffet of food (supplied by Bubs).

"So I said to Bubs, let's crash at Strong Bad's but where is he? And next thing you know, the pop singers of Mortallica scream 'I'm gooppy!' and next thing ya know, there's are inveesible people right behind us!" said Coach Z.

"I barely understand what you're talking about," replied Strong Sad.

"You know, this party is ten times better without Strong Bad! If he were here, all he would do is to grab our attention and do some weird dance with Poot-Slap! What the crap is it with that?" asked Bubs.

"DANCING SUCKS!" yelled Strong Mad as he ate a club sandwich in one bite.

"Hey! That was mine!" protested the King of Town, while having the opportunity for more food.

"By the way, where is Strong Bad?" asked Bubs.

"I don't know, maybe he's being visited by the three spirits of Decemberween to show him about his wrongdoings," explained Strong Sad.

The rest who were visible laughed at Strong Sad's explanation.

"But it could be true!" protested Strong Sad.

The ones who were laughing laughed even harder. Strong Bad and the King of Town were behind the partiers, but the partiers couldn't see Strong Bad and the King of Town.

"Uh, how come they were having a party right now while I was sleeping?" asked Strong Bad, but the King of Town was feasting on the buffet.

"Well, guess I'm hungry," said Strong Bad as he attempted to grab a Swiss Cake Roll, but his boxing glove went right through it, and then the King of Town ate it.

"Hey! How come you can eat while I can't! And won't they notice the absence of food?" asked Strong Bad.

"Hey, where's the food?" asked Coach Z.

"My chocolates ran away from me again!" exclaimed Bubs.

"Uh, shouldn't we go somewhere else?" asked Strong Bad.

"Go on to Homestar's place, I'm still feasting!" said the King of Town as he feasted on the pile of rotten eggs.

So Strong Bad went through walls to go to Homestar's house. He went through the wall and went to the living room.

The Cratchits were settled around the dinner table and said their grace. Then they began feasting on their goose

"Hurrah!" cried out Tiny Tim.

The family also had mashed potatoes and apple-sauce. For dessert, they had pudding. After dinner, they settled in their living room by the fireplace.

"A merry Decemberween to us all, my dears! Cornbread bless us!" said Bob Cratchit.

"Cornbread bless us all, everyone!" shouted Tiny Tim.

Homestar and Marzipan were actually watching the movie on television in Homestar's living room.

"Homestar, are you sure people are supposed to come to our party?" asked Marzipan as she looked at the table in the kitchen with tofu, vegetables shaped like turkey, and a tofu cake.

"I'm suwe," replied Homestar.

"Did you send out the invitations to Bubs, Coach Z, and some other people?" asked Marzipan.

"Oh, I sent them all to a Mellow mushwoom," replied Homestar.

"No wonder nobody's coming to the party," muttered Marzipan.

Then the doorbell rang. Homestar answered it and The Cheat came in. The Cheat was hobbling on a stick from the injury he got from the caper.

"Hello The Cheat, whatya wanna do?" asked Homestar.

"Uh, I think this is going to be too cute, I'll go back home now," said Strong Bad as he walked back to his house as The Cheat, Marzipan, and Homestar began singing Decemberween carols.

So he went back to sleep on his couch. An hour later, it got really chilly, as the partiers left the house. Strong Bad was woken up to see the spirit of Decemberween future…

… a tall person with a green cloak and a shovel.

"Hey man, you're the loser of the future?" asked Strong Bad.

The cloaked person only nodded.

"Oh, you're pretty silent eh? That's good enough to be the third weirdo," said Strong Bad.

The cloaked person just stood there, not answering.

"Okay, take me to the future," ordered Strong Bad.

Then the cloaked person grabbed Strong Bad and they went through some vortex to the future, going to the basement. The differences: the place was darker, the couch was replaced by a black leather couch, and the TV was replaced by a huge TV set with a DVD Player, DVD's, a Nintendo Game Pyramid, Playstation 3, an Xbox2, and other cool stuff not there in the present. Then they went to Strong Bad's computer room, and found a Windows XP and Beyond laptop. Strong Bad's computer room also had a poster that said "Pom-Pom's room" and had some posters with hot ladies.

"Hey! Where's my Lappy? I don't like new junk! Where's my Lappy?" asked Strong Bad.

The cloaked person didn't answer. Then Pom Pom arrived and went to MSN Hotmail to answer his emails (don't ask how he uses the computer).

**Dear Pom Pom,**

**How do you type with little flipper things that you can't even use to detach The Cheat taped to your body?**

**Michelangelo**

Pom Pom just deleted the email. Then the cloaked figure took Strong Bad to Strong Mad's room, who was crying constantly while looking at a picture. It was a picture of Strong Mad, Strong Bad, and Homestar dancing during the "Experimental Film" music video, except Homestar was cut out and replaced by a picture of The Cheat.

"Hey man, what's wrong? Oh right, I'm invisible, and untouchable," said Strong Bad.

Then Strong Bad saw something so bizarre, he almost fainted. It was Strong Sad, only it wasn't Strong Sad.

"Here comes the Strong Sad," sang magical voices in the tune of "Here Comes the Thnikkaman".

Strong Sad was wearing a blue vest, shades, and was smiling.

"Yo big bro, like, stop flooding the house, we both live in the same joint! Plus, it's Decemberween!" said Strong Sad.

"What the crap is wrong with him? I mean, joint is jail! Wait, this is something like jail, is it?" asked Strong Bad.

The cloaked figure just stood there.

"Anyway, you suck, I'm going to make out with Marzipan, although she's nothing compared to the thousands of hot girls attracted to me," said Strong Sad as he left. Magical voices sang, "There goes the Strong Sad!"

"So let me get this straight, Strong Sad's the coolest guy ever, henna, henna, henna?" asked Strong Bad.

The cloaked figure nodded. Then he took Strong Bad outside (raining, how strange) where he saw something at Bubs Concession Stand. Bubs and Coach Z (at a ruined Bubs Concession Stand) were selling all of Strong Bad's stuff FOR FREE! Worse, to the Unguraits!

"Oh crap, now those mutant cannibals get all of my stuff! Wait, wasn't the Poopsmith supposed to guard our place from the Unguraits?" asked Strong Bad.

The cloaked figure shook his head. Meanwhile, Strong Bad witnessed what was happening.

"Get your free Lappy 486 right here!" shouted Bubs as he tossed Strong Bad's laptop (probably broken down for some reason) to an Ungurait, who ran off to a newly-made cave house in Strongbadia, now a complex of cave houses for Unguraits. Strong Bad watched in horror as all of his cool stuff were given away for free to the barbaric creatures.

"What happened? Did something happen to the Poopsmith so the Unguraits could take over Free Country, USA?" asked Strong Bad.

The cloaked figure nodded. Then he took Strong Bad to the Stick, to see something weird: Homestar making out with the Tire!

"So aftew we do that, how about we go home and have some melonade?" asked Homestar.

"…" replied Tire.

"Oh, I see. Then how about owangeade?"

"…"

"Then what do you like?"

"…"

"Motor-Oil-ade? I think I can get something else, like Butter-da, do you want Butter-da?" asked Homestar.

"…" replied Tire.

"Man, you sure are picky when it comes to dwinks," said Homestar.

"Uh, did Homestar turn mental or something? I see what he's become without me," said Strong Bad.

Then they saw the King of Town, who turned slim and handsome (shudder) and cool. There were fans admiring him, as well as interviewers.

"And so, I'd like to say because of no Strong Bad, I got the chance for the spotlight," explained the King of Town.

"Let me guess, he's cool as well, as well as Homsar?" asked Strong Bad.

The cloaked person nodded and took Strong Bad to the long-deserted graveyard. On the way, they saw Homsar _was_ as cool as Strong Sad, for he was wearing shades and women were cooing over him.

At the graveyard, they saw Strong Mad mourning over a tombstone. Then Strong Mad walked away as Strong Bad and the cloaked figure looked at the tombstone.

"Here Lies The Cheat,

Died of the Popular-less Disease,

Cheating in the Great Beyond."

"What?! The Cheat is dead? Oh man! First, Strong Sad's cool. Next, Homsar's cool. Next, the King of Town's cool. Next, the Unguraits took over the place. Next, all of my stuff's sold for free. Next, Homestar's weird, and, er, weirder, and, weirderer. How can things get worse?" asked Strong Bad.

Then the cloaked figure pointed to another tombstone. Strong Bad read it.

HERE LIES

STRONG BAD

"Checking e-mails and kicking Cheats in the hereafter

Buried with his hundred girlfriends

And like, a jillion dollars

Please don't dig up the grave"

"Whoa! I'm dead! Whoa! That tombstone looks exactly like the way I wanted it to be! Nice! Someone's been paying attention! So, I guess you reveal yourself now. Wait, aren't you the Poopsmith?" Strong Bad asked the cloaked person.

Then the cloaked person pointed to the Poopsmith, riding a motorcycle with the King of Town.

"Happy Decemberween everybody!" shouted the Poopsmith, who broke his vow of silence.

"Then who the crap are you?" Strong Bad asked the cloaked person.

Then the cloaked person took off his hood, revealing, a black circle?

"Whoa! You're Stickly-Man! Dude! Can you teach me some tricks?" asked Strong Bad.

Stickly-Man whacked Strong Bad's head with his shovel, knocking him unconscious. Then Strong Bad woke up on his couch.

"Whoa, I guess this whole Decemberween thing is over. I guess I should do something nice… nah, I'll just throw a party," decided Strong Bad as he left the couch.

So Strong Bad had a party with a lot of people invited. They had a good time. Strong Bad still remained evil, but hey, at least he's not dead, as well as The Cheat. Speaking of that…

Strong Bad began singing after the party while Strong Mad and Strong Sad stayed.

"I got mad at The Cheat! Uh!

For screwing up the latest caper! Uh!

I hope I don't see his name in the caper, in the obituaries,

Cause that would mean he's dead.

The Cheat is not dead!

I'm so glad The Cheat is not dead,

The Cheat is not dead!" sang Strong Bad.

"DEAD!" shouted Strong Mad, who began clapping with Strong Sad.

"Oh, I'm so glad The Cheat is not dead. The Cheat is not dead!" sang Strong Bad.

"Dead!" shouted Strong Sad.

"I'm so glad The Cheat is not… Just the claps! Just the claps!" ordered Strong Bad as Strong Mad and Strong Sad continued clapping, "Strong Sad, you still have the rhythms?"

"Oh sure, I have them all the time," replied Strong Sad.

"Keep it rolling, guys, keep it rolling. Uh! I cracked wise at The Cheat!

But in my defense he cracked wise at me first!

I hope he doesn't end up in a hearse!

In the cemetery!

Cause, once again, that would mean he's dead," sang Strong Bad.

"The Cheat is not dead!" sang Strong Bad and a choir of kids, "I'm so glad the Cheat is not dead!

The Cheat is not dead!" sang the choir while Strong Bad said, "Whoa! Where'd this choir come from?"

"I'm so glad the Cheat is not dead!

The Cheat is not dead!" sang the choir while Strong Bad said, "You guys sound great!"

"I'm so glad The Cheat is not dead!

The Cheat is not dead!  
I'm so glad the cheat is not dead!  
The Cheat is not dead!  
I'm so glad the cheat is not dead!  
The Cheat is not dead!  
I'm so glad The Cheat is not dead...  
"CHEAT IS NOT DEAD! (Cheat is not dead!)" sang the choir, when Strong Bad pulled out a plug.

"Strong Sad, do you know what made the choir, sing?" asked Strong Bad.

"I don't know," replied Strong Sad.

"Anyway, Happy Decemberween, losers!" said Strong Bad as they were in a snowy area and a magical choir kept on singing, "Everybody, everybody!"

**THE END**

**Author Notes:**

This is what happened in the future:

When Strong Bad "died", The Cheat became unpopular, for Strong Bad would help him get people's attention, so The Cheat died of a disease for being so unpopular. Strong Mad constantly mourned for The Cheat. With his two brothers out of the way, Strong Sad became cool, and the same thing happened to the King of Town (as well as encouraging him to diet) and Homsar. Because the King of Town was cool, he got a lot of money, and paid the Poopsmith $1,000,000 to break his vow of silence and have a cooler job, and that's a pretty good deal. Without the Poopsmith, the Unguraits invaded Free Country, USA, destroyed Pom-Pom's home and a little bit of Bubs' Concession Stand. Since Strong Bad wasn't there, they decided to not eat everyone else, for they hated Strong Bad. Then they lived in a cave house complex in Strongbadia. Because Pom-Pom lost his home, he lived in the Strongs house. Without Strong Bad to keep in control and Marzipan falling in love with Strong Sad, Homestar started to make out with the Tire, the lone survivor from Strongbadia.


End file.
